Thursday, 1 November 2012

Stereotypical Emotions

Even the most feeling-less of people can have feelings. One can convince themselves that they feel nothing. But that's not true. They have just not been subjected to a situation that triggers their feelings, and that situation may be very unpleasant.
Impartiality. What is it? Driven by circumstances, one's mind subconsciously bars those thoughts from entering the conscious mind. Puts them behind a "wall". If the magnitude of the enclosed emotions is large enough, it leaves a void in the conscious mind. A gaping hole. The sudden transition of those emotions from the conscious into an enclosed section makes the person feel empty. Something they can mistake for 'feeling nothing'. Feeling 'numb'. A strong person may be able to handle those pent up emotions for a long time. A weaker person may succumb to those emotions and vent out negatively. The 'piling' up of emotions within the 'walls' can have many repercussions. The person in question deals with it in accordance to his or her emotional stability. Some may vent in a positive manner: exercise, music, art. Some may vent in a negative manner: inflicting pain on themselves or others, causing people harm, being reckless, committing suicide.
The void cannot be filled, unless the person in question wants it to be filled. This is not denial. This is a way of locking matters up when they get too much to handle. Granted, it’s unhealthy. But a strong defense mechanism does not allow the person to deal with it and makes them 'forget' it ever happened. The unanswered question is: what happens when they eventually reach the breaking point of all the 'forgotten' emotions? Not the ones they put on pending, but the ones their minds chose to 'forget'? Because information once plugged into the brain, does NOT get lost. It just goes deeper within, and becomes harder to access consciously. You never 'forget'. You just 'lose' the memory within the vast realms of your subconscious mind.
Everyone and everything has a breaking point. There is no ‘unbreakable’ material that we know of in our universe. It defies the laws of physics. We generally apply the same concept when we say ‘I’ve reached my breaking point’ and so on and so forth.
Here is where I’d like to go out on a limb and say that MOST of the time, humans do not just (emotionally) break or snap. They bend. I like to think of our emotional threshold to be of a malleable nature. SurrealSuperElasticTypeThing.  Keep applying pressure, it’ll keep bending, and MOST of the time, it won’t snap. (Emphasis on MOST, because sometimes people DO snap, that much is obvious)

Some people can find a way to deal with the emotional pressure and get back to the way they were normally. Some people take a long time to deal with things, some don’t. Some can be normal, some stay scarred for a long time. It all depends on what your mind –in essence, YOU- want to do. Mourn, rebel, vent, rationalise, ignore?
The ages-old question has been: What is the best way to deal with problems?  ‘Cause let’s face it, EVERYONE has problems.

To start off, stop CREATING problems for yourself. ß What have I said? Who would create problems for themselves?
Well, don’t be surprised. People, at times, ENJOY being depressed or angry. They enjoy the sympathy they get. They enjoy the misery they feel, and then they feel sorry for themselves.
There are those who state their problems to the world at large, portraying themselves as people who have been wronged, and enjoy themselves thoroughly as the sympathy comes pouring in.
There are those who do not advertise their misery but act depressed and wait for people to ask what’s wrong. They get an ego boost as well as a sympathetic companion.
There are those who cry about their issues, then pretend to be completely fine instantly and get both sympathy as well as praise for being so ‘strong’.

It’s alright to fall into one of these categories. I’m QUITE sure only humans will be reading this. :P It is deep-rooted in human beings to be attracted towards peace, towards sanctity, solace. One can find peace in sympathy, praise, support, understanding, or simply by sharing their burdens.
Let go of things. Try rationalising WHY they happened, nothing ever happens without a reason. Vent out, in a positive manner. Refrain from depending completely on people: it’ll become a never ending cycle of trusting someone, getting shattered, trusting someone, getting shattered- with the person changing every time you decide to trust or depend on someone. Sure, you can talk about your problems, but do so to SOLVE the issues, not just to share what’s happening.

We complicate our lives ourselves. Seldom have I observed people having a conversation about their problems that leads somewhere. Very rarely have I seen two people reach a consensus on how to go about a certain issue, and more often than not, the two are not completely convinced or satisfied.
Think about it this way: it’s YOUR problem… YOU hold the power to solve it. YOU get to choose the way you think is right. Why would you want sympathy? It won’t get you anywhere. But oh well, we’re all human. We regard sympathy to be as important as water is to sustain life. You disagree, don’t you? That’s because you’ve never thought about it. You’ve done so subconsciously. Typically, we function on a system of give and take, but I completely disagree with the efficiency of it. It takes far too long, and has too many hurdles.

Strive to fix things before they get too much to handle. Trust me, if you want a problem to be solved, it will be. You just need to be willing to compromise.

P.S: To everything I have said, there are exceptions. To every category I have stated, there is a lot more that can be said. What I have written is my way of trying to understand this better, to convince MYSELF of it. So if you happen to disagree with me, fair enough. Everyone’s entitled to their own opinion.
Thanks for reading. Ciao!